WHAT MODERN MEN WANT FROM WOMEN-up-dates!

By Sally Law, LiveScience's Science of Sex Columnist

posted: 13 February 2009


What do men want in a woman? Brains? Beauty? Vacuuming prowess?

Researchers at the University of Iowa find that men increasingly are interested in intelligent, educated women who are financially stable — and chastity isn't an issue.

The findings are part of a study, conducted every decade since 1939, which asks participants to rank a list of 18 characteristics they would want in a partner on a scale ranging from "irrelevant" to "essential." Included are such items as "sociability" and "good cook, housekeeper," as well as "mutual attraction and love," which came in first place for both men and women in 2008. (In 1939, it wasn't in the top three for either sex.)

Male and female participants in 2008 rounded out their top traits with "dependable character" and "emotional stability, maturity." Men ranked intelligence fourth, a big jump from 11th place in 1939; in addition, "good financial prospect" moved to 12th place in 2008, a shift from its low 17th-place ranking in 1939 and last-place ranking in 1967.

"This is a generation of men who has grown up with educated women as their mothers, teachers, doctors, and role models," said Christine Whelan, head of the study and author of "Marry Smart: The Intelligent Woman's Guide to True Love" (Simon & Schuster, 2008). "And in tough economic times, sharing the financial burden with a spouse takes the burden off these guys to be the sole provider."

The study's participants were college students from the University of Iowa, the University of Washington, the University of Virginia, and Penn State University.

"Like attracts like, so certainly the fact that we were polling college students would suggest that intelligence and education are going to be important characteristics," Whelan says.

Another notable shift involves the significance of chastity: In 1939, it was valued more than intelligence in women, but in 2008, it was ranked the least important characteristic. Furthermore, it also was ranked the least important for men. This, coupled with the shared top-three ranking for both men and women, suggests a commonality that seems positively modern-day.

Details of the study are below.

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Details:

WHAT MEN WANT

Essential characteristics:

Mutual attraction and love
Dependable character
Emotional stability
Important characteristics:

Education and intelligence
Good looks
Ambition
Desirable characteristics:

Good financial prospect
Good cook and housekeeper
Unimportant characteristics:

Similar political background
Chastity
WHAT WOMEN WANT

Essential characteristics:

Mutual attraction and love
Dependable character
Emotional stability
Important characteristics:

Education and intelligence
Desire for home and children
Ambition
Desirable characteristics

Good looks
Refinement
Unimportant characteristics:

Similar political background
Chastity
Comments (15)
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v_o_r wrote:
Well, at least "dependable character" and "emotional stability" are close to the top. People don't think about "chastity" (it's not "celibacy," yeesh) as closely related to "dependable character" but the characteristics are so closely related as to be nearly indistinguishable. "Chastity" means you don't cheat.

"Mutual attraction and love" are transitory (I presume this refers to the in-love feeling). It's great when you have it but if you want a lasting relationship, it will have to be based on something else.

2 Recommend | Report Abuseposted 2/13/2009 12:23:31 PMpdxmusl wrote:
Actually, chastity does refer or is often used interchangably with celibacy. More specifically it refers to morality in sexual behavior.

5 Recommend | Report Abuseposted 2/13/2009 1:04:56 PMHotone wrote:
It would be nice to see a sample size and the selection process if any.

Personally, I find it illogical that a person interested in politics could handle a mate that is from the opposite side of the political spectrum. So many arguments can erupt from different political beliefs. Chastity should be more clearly defined. Most people now days probably don't care if their partner has experience but too much "experience" would definitely be undesirable.

7 Recommend | Report Abuseposted 2/13/2009 3:31:12 PMHierophant wrote:
Good looks being rated in merely the "desireable" category in the women's section is a lie. Women are more self-conscious about their desire for good looking mates than men are. They feel those things SHOULDN'T be somewhere at the top of the list. Sadly it's true for both genders, men are just more openly shallow about it. For either gender, if they don't like what they see, they aren't going to talk to you to find out the rest of it.

16 Recommend | Report Abuseposted 2/13/2009 4:19:41 PMDebiwinters wrote:
Did you see this photo for Valentine's Day of Al Capone?


2/13/2009 5:17:27 PMsharptoothuk wrote:
I would go along with what the male survey has said. I love energetic and positive women more than anything else. Good looks would be an added bonus. Women like this are in high demand though so you need to be on the top of your game too!

From personal experience, i find some women put more emphasis on looks than others but generally they are not as shallow as men. If you can make a woman laugh and are relaxed around her then you can get build attraction. I have seen many examples of more attractive women with average looking men.


1 Recommend | Report Abuseposted 2/13/2009 5:33:58 PMhwangeruk wrote:
Aren't people fussy. I am simply looking for large boobs and a willingness to perform oral sex.
I don't even care about the laundry.

18 Recommend | Report Abuseposted 2/13/2009 5:57:36 PMnovaseeker wrote:
Chastity as unimportant?

It's one of the main reasons why marriages break up. Having both men and women not value it in selecting mates is very telling. It means people are marrying people who are quite sexually prolific, which leads to divorces down the road.


3 Recommend | Report Abuseposted 2/13/2009 7:10:39 PMHierophant wrote:
I forget who said it, but this quote has always stuck with me:

"Every man wants a virgin who's a whore."

Hey, now we men can be as self-contradicting as you women are, imagine that. :D lol

1 Recommend | Report Abuseposted 2/14/2009 4:45:32 PMEye wrote:
hwangeruk - LOL - thats for a date, not someone you want to marry. I'ld really like to see this same survey done with married people and see what their results are, I bet it would change quite a bit.

1 Recommend | Report Abuseposted 2/14/2009 5:48:12 PM
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